This is my very good friend Kim, who I've known since I was, oh, five or so. She's absolutely the sweetest person I've ever met in my life. Seriously, I'm not being trite at all - "sweet" is absolutely the best word to describe her.

I'd intended on contacting her when I got to Maine, since I haven't seen her in years. We've e-mailed a bit recently, and I wanted to take the opportunity to see her. But things escalated and went to hell so quickly that I never got a chance.

We were standing at Grandma's graveside, and the service was about to start. An unfamiliar car pulled up and I watched the driver get out. My heart thudded and I started crying when I recognized Kim. My sister asked the woman to hold the services and gestered for me to go greet Kim. I hugged her tightly and kept repeating "I can't believe you came! I can't believe you're here!" She was crying too, and I brought her back to the others. She stood beside me and I held her hand through the entire service. Susan was on my other side with her arm around me, and Sable stood between us with my hand gripped in her's. It was the only way we all could get through it.

The service seemed to last forever, and it was so hard for me to concentrate on what the woman was saying. I kept letting my attention wander to the sound of the birds, or the traffic in the distance, and then I'd wrench my attention back with a horrified reminder that this was my Grandmother's *funeral*, and I wasn't even paying attention. I know it was a defence mechanism, and my sister confessed the same experience to me, later.

That whole week was the worst of my entire life. But seeing Kimmy again was wonderful.